Lindsay Robbed her own Home?

Check out these surveillance shots of the burglary suspects outside Lindsay Lohan's home, and one of them looks familiar. In fact, even Lindsay knows who it is, according to her Twitter page:Yes, that certain old friend knew to go right for the nude pics and embarrassing legal documents, BECAUSE IT WAS YOU. Seriously, look at that first pic and tell me that's not Lindsay Lohan. Unfortunately, the camera didn't have infrared otherwise you'd see an abnormally high heat signature coming from the groin area, so now we're forced to rely on old-fashioned detective work. Namely pointing directly at a picture of Lindsay robbing her own house and saying "There she is."





that's how i know it was not a ROBBERY. electronics weren't taken... just things that a certain old friend knew meant a lot to meSeen here strung out as hell leaving Bardot last night, Lindsay Lohan's stolen safe is starting to become more and more convenient. Apparently inside was $2 millions worth of jewels she had on loan but, surprise, those pesky robbers took it. RadarOnline reports:

Lindsay had the jewels on loan from swanky Beverly Hills store, XIV Karats, from over two months ago but when asked to return the pricy baubles the Mean Girls star fessed up that she didn't have them.

"Lindsay claimed that they had been stolen from her safe," a source tells RadarOnline.com

"They've disappeared. XIV are not happy about it.

"The jewels were in Lindsay's care and they were only on a loaner, they were expected to be returned. If something is not resolved soon there will be legal action taken."

Lindsay in Real Bad Mood These Days

I don’t know what’s up with Lohan, but she looks angry. Maybe Samantha Ronson’s sticking her dick in some other famous pussy now that she’s gone as far as she can go by riding Lohan’s name and becoming relevant, at least more relevant that her acoustic stage show she was hustlin’ before, or maybe it’s got nothing to do with Samantha Ronson and she’s just having a bad day, and really why do I fucking write about it like I care, when I totally don’t. If anything, I just like how Lohan constantly changes her look to give me different characters to include in my masturbation fantasies, whether it be ex stripper, or strung out stripper, or teen popstar, or whatever, her outfit changes do serve a purpose for me and that purpose is cumming.

Lindsay Lohan Stealing Jewelry Again?

Lindsay Lohan may have stolen jewelry again. Sigh. Lindsay just can’t keep her sticky fingers out of the jewelry jar, can she? This time, high end store XIV Karats is claiming Lohan swiped $2 million worth of baubles. Two million! Jeez, Lindsay hasn’t made two million in eons. Can you imagine the payment plan that would require?
XIV Karats lent her the jewelry (their mistake) two months ago and are patiently waiting for her to return the goods. Conveniently, Lindsay was robbed recently and is blaming the loss on those thieves.

“Lindsay claimed that they had been stolen from her safe,” a source tells RadarOnline.com “They’ve disappeared. XIV are not happy about it. The jewels were in Lindsay’s care and they were only on a loaner, they were expected to be returned. If something is not resolved soon there will be legal action taken.”

Lindsay just cannot catch a break. We blame Michael Lohan. Oh, and her mother/wannabe sister Dina.

Neighbours want Lindsay Out?

In a stunning turn of events, it turns out Lindsay Lohan's neighbors actually hate being waken up at 4 AM by her and the paparazzi. Her neighbor told RadarOnline:

"The truth is that this is a very quiet neighborhood and there have been no break-ins apart from at Lindsay Lohan’s house. Since she moved in last November it has been a nightmare with all the paparazzi parking in our driveways waiting for her.

"This is a really narrow and winding street and I’m amazed there has not been a more serious accident. I’ve got nothing personal against her but she needs to find a home in a gated community with security at the main gate because all the residents are fed-up with the situation."

It sounds like Lindsay's neighbors want her around about as much as Hollywood movie producers. Can you really blame the neighbors for wanting her out? With all the paparazzi, traffic, and dental dams strewn about their community, their property values are bottoming out worse than Tori Spelling's chest.

Naughty Pictures of Lindsay Stolen in Burglary?

Lindsay Lohan might have had naughty pictures stolen. It seems that shoes and jewelry aren’t the only things that were taken when Lindsay’s house was robbed. Lindsay appears to be freaking out a little because what was taken is really, really bad for her.

Lindsay apparently kept track of some pictures and video of herself enjoying some extra curricular activities. According to the Chicago Sun Times:

I’ve learned the real reason Lindsay Lohanis so upset about the theft of the safe from her L.A. house is the contents included some very incriminating videos and photos, plus legal documents, that LiLo believes could cause embarrassment if made public.

So what’s your guess on what Lindsay did? Drugs on tape? Sex? Something to break her probation and land her butt in jail? Whatever it is, if it is released to the public you know the person who did it will land in jail too. Maybe that’s why Lindsay called daddy-o first and not the cops. She was afraid of what was taken!

Lindsay Lohan’s House got burglared AGAIN

Lindsay Lohan’s house was robbed again! Lindsay came home from a night of partying at 3 AM and noticed something was amiss from her house. And then she checked, the burglary was caught on tape. What is it with criminals in LA?




Lindsay had a break in earlier this summer and the vandals were caught on her security tape. This time, the alarm wasn’t set to scare them off. Hmmmm, curious? According to TMZ:

Michael Lohan tells TMZ a safe was ripped off the wall and a couple of watches were taken. He believes it’s “an inside job” because the people that work for Lindsay failed to turn the alarm on. He says, “I am not going to put up with individuals violating my family. Lindsay is a charitable, generous person that always gives. This is a personal violation and it has got to stop.”

We’re told Lindsay came home early this morning, around 3:00 AM, discovered the break-in and called her dad.

Why did Lindsay call her dad – she supposedly told him to stay away – instead of the police? Why is Michael talking to the press for Lindsay?

Lindsay Lohan hot in Soho

Here's a braless Lindsay Lohan in SoHo yesterday and why the hell is she wearing a pillowcase as a shirt? I thought this chick did nothing but buy clothes with Samantha Ronson's money 24/7. Okay, that wasn't fair. Sometimes she buys Red Bull.

It looks like Lindsay Lohan may be getting a little sick of hearing me call her skinny because she seems to have decided to do something about it. Here she is out having a smoke in some slutty pirate boots and short shorts looking like she he’s had some fat injections, sadly they’re only in her lips but it’s a start. Hopefully phase two will be in her tits and then maybe plump up the ass a little bit. I can handle the chicken legs if they’re attached to a nice set of tits. Keep up the good work.

Lindsay Goes Street Shopping

This is like a scene out of that crap movie Pretty Woman, not because Lohan is pretty, but because she is looking like a streetwalker who has landed a John dumb enough to give her his credit card to hit up the high-end boutiques and buy herself something that makes her look presentable for all his upper class lawyer friends. Not only am I surprised that she still has money to buy all the expensive clothes she buys, but I’m also surprised at why her face looks like a Halloween mask and it’s only August, not to mention the boutique was nice enough to let her bring her Monkey inside to shop with her, which is a lot better than the store owners around me who yell at me when I bring my dog in, I guess because I’m not Lindsay Lohan and I didn’t star in a couple of movies 5 years ago. Just another example of how unfair life is.

Lindsay slammed by Elle for being unprofessional

Elle UK editor Lorraine Candy was so inconvenienced by Lohan’s lack of professionalism that she included the details in her editor’s note. Lindsay appears on the cover of the September issue, and it sounds like Elle would have preferred not to work with her after all the stunts she pulled. This is consistent with the video Elle released of Lindsay’s photoshoot, in which the time is listed as 1:30 am and Elle UK creative director Marissa Bourke says “I think we waited 12 hours, which for me is kind of a record.” The magazine’s editor-in-chief Lorraine Candy is the newest name added to the never-ending list of people put off by the troubled starlet.
Candy revealed the 23-year-old actress had Elle magazine staffers running in circles around London trying to pin her down for the issue’s photo shoot and interview.
The story follows Lohan as she was pursued by photographers and recounts a tearful confrontation with off-again, on-again girlfriend Samantha Ronson.
“Lindsay Lohan wrote me a note during this month’s cover shoot,” Candy wrote in the new issue. “It read: ‘Let’s do it again some time.’ I’ve put it on my office wall because, in all honesty, I don’t know if I could.”

She adds, “This was the most unpredictable, and confusing shoot in my magazine career.

Candy’s harsh words are a sad reality for the actress, whose dwindling career is often overshadowed by her dramatic lifestyle.
“First, Lindsay was about to arrive. Then she was in Paris,” Candy wrote. “She was almost on set, then she disappeared into her hotel room. She was ready for her interview, then she had to have a fake tan! But we got there.”

[From NY Daily News]

This is just one example among the many incidents through which Lohan threw away a once-promising film career by acting like an entitled brat. It’s amazing that anyone is still willing to work with her at all. Lindsay has inexplicably landed a part in Robert Rodriguez’s film Machete, which also stars Michelle Rodriguez, Jessica Alba, and Robert De Niro. She’s also still attached to a dance film called Dare to Love Me, and is set to film The Other Side with Giovanni Ribisi and Jason Lee, this fall. The film is written and directed by a Scientologist who is listed as a “clear,” David Michaels, and both Ribisi and Lee are Scientologists. Do you think the Scientologists will try to recruit Lohan? I can see her giving it a try and getting rejected for being too difficult and refusing to pay up.

Lohan is losing her hair at alarming rate!

I have a hell of a lot of empathy for Lindsay Lohan. And you never hear me say that. But Lindsay has beaten the crap out of her hair over the years, in addition to living a pretty hard life – by choice. Thanks to frequent dye jobs and extensions (likely coupled with poor dietary standards and heavy alcohol and drug use) her hair is so thin that you can see her scalp. Whenever I see photos of Lindsay I’ve always been impressed with how thick and pretty her hair is, but it turns out that’s just because of all her extensions. Which is one of the best ways to make sure you keep on losing your hair – and of course it rarely looks good up close.
Lindsay Lohan is losing her hair at an alarming rate!

After years of abusing various hair products — dyes & extensions, etc. — the Mean Girls actress’ scalp is starting to show.

And that’s not all — Lohan usually leaves a trail of red hair wherever she goes!

“Lindsay has done so much to her hair, it’s a wonder she hasn’t lost it all!” an insider told American tabloid the National Enquirer. “She overprocesses it and gets too many extensions, which often rip her real hair out.

“You know Lindsay has been around when you see these long red hairs everywhere.”

Ronson convinces Lindsay to go to counseling

It’s lovely to think that Lindsay Lohan can still be saved. And while I don’t want to be overly pessimistic here, her family history and lack of basic intellect tell me it’s not likely to happen. And frankly Lindsay’s been doing this way too long without the serious consequences most of us would have suffered. Sure, she’s basically unemployable, but she still manages to rent out a $10,000 a month home and do nothing but shop with all of her limitless free time. The average person with Lindsay’s issues would probably struggle just to keep a roof over their head. Whatever consequences Lindsay has suffered, they’re not enough to get her to change her behavior. Which makes me think that nothing is, since all that’s left is jail… and the only thing worse.

According to the Enquirer, Samantha Ronson fears that worse thing – that she’ll come home and find Lindsay dead. But she hasn’t given up on the “actress” yet, and has managed to talk her into going into a counseling program together.

Samantha Ronson, terrified that her deeply depressed, drugged-out lover Lindsay Lohan has entered the final stages of a death spiral a la Anna Nicole Smith and Michael Jackson, phoned LiLo’s family and their closest friends, begged for intervention help to save her life - and finally convinced the fading young actress to enter a no-nonsense counseling program they’ll both attend. Things came to a head after Sam found Lindsay camped out on her doorstep at 5 a.m., and camera mics caught the hysterical star sobbing: “WHERE WERE YOU? Where were you?… I’ve been crying… Where were you?… Where were you?… Where were you? Where were you?” Wailed Sam to pals: “I’m afraid I’m going to come home and find her dead!” Stay tuned.

Lindsay Lohan did photo shoot for ELLE